Sunday, January 18, 2009

anger

I admit, I don't often really forget or put behind me times when I feel I have been betrayed or wronged. I try, but I can't. It's an ugly problem that can consume me from time to time.

I clicked my way back to this video today. I've seen it before, but it's great and really does deserve to be seen again. I think the person that put this together did a great job. It captures the sadness of infertility well. And all the blackness in it reminds me of all the uncertainty you experience going through this.

Then I thought again of my SIL... the tiff we had at Christmas is supposed to be behind us, but I'm not letting go so easily. Luckily I don't have to see her often. I really wish I would have remembered this video when I emailed her. I would have sent her the link. Maybe it would have helped her to understand just a little.

Seeing that video and thinking about the real problems in our lives puts some perspective on all the other crap flying around. It makes it harder to be angry when it seems like there is really only one thing that matters.

2 comments:

Celia said...

Dammit, that video always makes me cry.

I think it's ok to still be angry. I am not always able to let go either.

We aren't saints.

My co-worker reminded me TWICE this past Christmas that I was still working and not home with a baby like I had planned last year. I think it's pretty spectacular that I did not punch her. "Weeeeeelllll Celia, I thought you said you'd be hooooooome by now. Guess it didn't work out like you planned."

A small piece of advice, don't piss off the person that handles your schedule.

birdsandsquirrels said...

I don't let go of betrayal easily either. Especially when a pregnant asshole is involved.

It's probably not too late to send her a link to that video...