Well, nothing new from last week really. I'm still really, really thirsty. And my face looks like raw hamburger. But no morning sickness. No feelings. No nothing. It's very weird. Somehow I thought you were suppose to feel pregnant during pregnancy. Could someone tell me when that's suppose to happen? Honestly, I think telling people probably helps you to feel pregnant cause then you don't have to pretend all the time like it's not happening. I haven't told anyone (except my drs and priest) and all this pretending is feeling like reality right now.
And not that their is any logical reason to think this, but I'm convinced it's dead. I know, I'm crazy, but I will be utterly shocked if it is alive at my appt next week. That's how unpregnant I feel.
And I couldn't contain it any longer and called my OB's office to check that I was getting an u/s at my appointment. I politely explained that I would be pretty upset if I wasn't getting one and the nurse said it's their policy to do one at this point, so, yes, I should be getting an u/s next week. Cause obviously, I can't have a rational conversation about all of this right now, cause I'm convinced it's dead.
I need to start preparing for my appointment. I have so much I want to ask about that I can't imagine their will be enough time. I'm thinking of writing out all my medications ahead of time so we can at least speed that part along. And I really need to talk about my meds... the progesterone, met, baby aspirin.... I also want to ask about getting a flu shot (not that it will do squat against swine flu which has invaded my tiny community), and I know I'm out of date on tetanus. And, I'm getting my teeth cleaned afterwards and it's been an embarassingly long time since I've been to the dentist and I know they will want to take x-rays and they have a 'low dose' digital x-ray they will probably try to convince me is safe and I need to ask the ob about that. And I need to tell her that the thought of an episomity freaks me out big time. And I'm considering using a doula. And what happens if I get GD and do they normally induce earlier because of that. And I need nutritional support if some is available to keep me from ballooning. And none of this matters cause I'm sure it's dead. Yeah, I'm a little nuts.