Thursday, May 6, 2010

Daycare problems

I don't like my daycare.

I like the care workers.

I think they take good care of him in most respects.

I think he is safe there.

I do not like the day care director.

I think they can could do better in certain areas.

So what's going on is that I feel like I was kinda ambushed last night because the daycare director was at the baby house and had a talk with me about Michael's routine and schedule at pick up last night. It wasn't a bad talk and I'm not 100% sure she was there so that she could personally talk with me about this stuff or not (vs. just filling in), but things didn't feel right.

Michael doesn't nap well during the day there. I have offered up several suggestions to help them, I'm not sure if they are implementing them or not. All I know is that I usually pick up a very tired and hungry baby and take him home and nurse him and he's usually out for the night by 5:30.

Some days he gets better naps and I was hoping that the situation there would improve, but it is still difficult and not showing the signs of improvement I thought it should have by now.

I don't think he eats enough during the day. When I'm nursing, he eats enough that I feel thoroughly drained by the end of the day. At work I pump about 20oz a day and he's usually only eating 10-13oz a day (and spitting up a lot of it). I think he should be eating 15+oz per day to be closer to what he eats when breastfed. We weighed him last night and in the last 12 days he has gained no weight. He weighs 18.5 lbs and does not need to gain weight at a half pound per week like he was before daycare, but that doesn't mean that he should stop gaining weight altogether.

So after the talk with the director last night and weighing him, I came up with a sheet about helping him to nap (signs that he's tired, our routine, etc) and pacifier use (I think they are overusing the pacifier when the should be offering him a bottle).

I called the director and told her I'd come up with this list to help them and she was a total bitch to me. She let me know that I should call his pediatrician but she's sure it's not a problem since he is so large and that they don't have time to go over the list with me and I should just drop it off and they'll read it later and that there are 7 other children to take care of and they can't stop taking care of them and only my child. B.I.T.C.H.

I told her that I wanted to go over the list in person and made myself 100% available either during the day or at night. And told her my list is supposed to help them... you know, so he cries less and is easier to care for... I don't know why she is so resistive to him crying less and being easier to take care of, except that she's a bitch. So now I'm waiting on her to call me back with a time.

I did put in a call to the pediatrician. I know Michael is large but that doesn't mean that he shouldn't still gain weight. The point of my calling was to "intervene" now before we have a REAL problem so that he get's back into an appropriate growth rate and the care he gets there is not holding back his development.

Anyhow, I've been feeling it for awhile, we need to find another daycare. I really think we could work through all of this, but her attitude is just not inline with what it should be for a person providing child care.

My only fear is that I could end up with a worse situation if I switch him somewhere else. The devil you know vs. the one you don't. Plus I could only find 2 infant openings when I was looking before he was born, it's hard finding infant spots around here.

My secretary recommended her children's former sitter (they are older now and don't need one). Her sitter is going on vacation at the end of the month but told me to call her back on June 7th. She is cheaper, nearly as close by, cloth diapered my secretary's kids so that shouldn't be an issue, and comes highly recommended. Dear God, please let this work out. I can put up with the current B.S. until then, I think.


Michelle said...

Ugh.. this director sounds terrible. Why wouldn't they want help with keeping him happier?!?!
I hope the home care works out for you.

Kate said...

I hope the sitter turns out to be a great fit for you. I'd hate the daycare director too!

Celia said...

You have to feel comfortable with your daycare choice.

Suraita said...

I hope the sitter works out or you are able to get the daycare to come into line - if you use home daycare with the sitter I'd be interested to hear about it. That's what I wanted to use but I could not find one I liked around here - it isn't very common in our area for some reason.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I can't believe what a bitch that director is! Seriously, I used to teach preschool, and granted I worked with older children, but neither I nor the other teachers nor the director would ever treat a parent like that, saying she didn't have time to read your note about how to help your baby! That is a huge problem and I am glad you are looking for another situation.

I hope that the new potential sitter works out. It can certainly be challenging to find infant care, so I can understand you being hesitant to change the situation, but you have to trust your instincts and do what feels right for Michael.

SarahEdgeworth said...

I think that you really need to trust you gut! Any childcare worker should be more than willing to follow a schedule like you gave them. I had similar problems with my son's daycare in the beginning but once I gave them the schedule and they learned his sleep cues it got so much better! I hope the at home sitter works out!

amanda said...

I'm so sorry you're having to deal with that. How stressful. It definitely sounds like you're making the right move seeking out other care. I hope the potential sitter works out.

Molly said...

Yeah, I'd want to leave that daycare ASAP. Isn't it their JOB to take care of your little one? Isn't it supposed to be in their nature to want to do the best for your child? I hope you find an alternative soon. xo

The Lynchs said...

The director sounds terrible! And I've learned that intuition usually is correct - I'm hoping the other sitter works out!

Michelle said...

Wow. The director sounds horrible!
I think you are doing the right thing by checking around in other options.
I'm not sure how long he is there, but I know for here, since watching this little guy, he has always had more than 15ozs a day while here. He is here 12 hrs and eats every 3-4.
I think the list and ideas for them is a great idea and I hope you can get them to sit down and go over it with them. I'd love it if someone would have done that for me when I first started watching these babies!
good luck. I hope it works out and you don't have to deal with that drama!