Friday, July 30, 2010

6 months!

I think most people usually comment about how time has flown by so fast... and it has. But mostly, I can't believe it's only been six months considering how much he has grown, developmentally and physically. Sometimes I forget that I had a life before this, because I can't imagine a life without him now.

He's getting pretty good at the sitting up thing, but he's still a bit wobbly, so boppy assistance is needed. He's rolling both directions pretty well. It won't be long now until he's crawling. Wow. Amazing.


And the winner is...


(I did it out of 12 instead of 13 because Joy left an extra comment for her email, which wasn't counted).

Congrats Michelle. I'm sure you will proudly display it in your new home! I'll email you soon.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010


I feel lucky that I didn't have a bunch of friends that headed down the aisle before me and I didn't have to sit back and contain my jealously as they grew baby bumps. It's hard to sit back and wonder when it will be your turn as your friends leave you behind.

Actually, I usually feel a bit less ambitious than my friends from high school and college because I got married and had a baby. I'm very proud of my friends... so many of them are doing exciting things with their lives. Living in foreign countries, politics, dolphin training, film making and directing, med school, law school. I have such ambitious friends that I feel like total slacker because I only have a BS and MS degrees in engineering.

I wonder if they think about me say to themselves, "Too bad Amanda is so tied down with her husband and baby."

Their ambition has been manifested in their careers. But I was diagnosed with complete anovulation and PCOS as a teenager. I was smart enough and good in school... I wasn't ever worried about what I would 'do' with my life, I was worried I wouldn't have a child to share it with. So my ambition was put into having a family.

So I have never done so many of the exciting things many of my friends have been able to do, but I have been ambitious. I'm happy about where I am in life, and that's what matters.


Hey, are you reading this? Then you are a reader of my blog and you should try to win my ovary by leaving a comment about yourself in the post below before Friday! Google tells me I have 54 followers (not that you have to be a follower... just a reader), so I'm expecting a few more comments.

Friday, July 23, 2010

In honor of Michael's 1/2 Birthday

I'm giving away an ovary!!!

Yes, you heard right! I've got one good ovary here. She has been thoroughly inspected and I have declared her cyst free (since I play an RE on the internets).

Her name is Ova Achiever. I saw her on I Heart Guts and thought, one of my blog readers needs her.

So here's the deal...

1. You must be a blog reader of mine. I'm going with the honesty policy on this.

2. You do NOT need to have PCOS or even be TTCing to win.

3. You cannot be a Chinese porn spammer. Damn spammers.

4. You have to leave me a comment and tell me something Interesting and/or Funny about yourself!

5. I'm going to be a spoil sport and limit this to US addresses. Sorry to my international readers. (But if you have a US friend that you want me to ship it to, I'd be willing.)

I will randomly select a winner on Michael's 6 month birthday, July 30th. So you need to leave a comment before then. And make sure I have a way to get ahold of you.

Alright, I expect to get some good comments.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

The Sparkles

Anyone else ever get the "sparkles"?

Before I got pregnant, I only ever had them once when I was a teenager. I didn't know how to describe them at the time, but they kinda reminded me of the story of the conception of Perseus.

But I got them much more frequently when I was pregnant, and I didn't really know if it was a problem or not. The pregnancy book I had never mentioned them. When I started to get a little preeclamptic, my MFM asked me about visual disturbances and I tried to describe to him the golden singes of light I see and he said, "Oh, the sparkles, no, those are fine." So I guess they aren't anything to get worried about.

And since having the baby I've only had them a couple of times. Including this morning. I usually took them as a sign to slow down during pregnancy. I don't think I needed slowing down this morning. When I have had my blood glucose meter near by I have tried to check that to see if I could blame low/high sugar, but I've never seen anything out of the norm there.

So does anyone else know what I'm talking about? Anyone ever ask a dr. about them? Just curious.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Animal Testing

I'm normally against testing products on animals, but when they volunteer, who am I to get in the way?

Ambrosia enthusiastically helped test out the Moby wrap and sling we got. She preferred the Moby (I wish I had got a picture of her in the sling). At least someone likes them.

She really loved his little seat. She loved it so much that she chewed up the orange infant insert in it. Good thing the kid grew so quickly we never needed to use it. (But seriously, she actually likes to sit in it just like this.)

She was unable to give her opinion on this due to ethical reasons. She does not believe that she can fully render an opinion without testing the vibrate feature of the chair.

She also served to test out our BabySense V monitor... which she is not testing here. Just being a good girl.

And Bliss... she helps too.


Wednesday, July 14, 2010

My experience with co-sleeping

Or the cause and cure for my nightmares.

Co-sleeping is not something that interested me. It wouldn't really work with our bed and a co-sleeper would not be able to attach to it either due to the style. DH sleeps like a rock and I legitimately fear him rolling onto the baby. Increased risk of SIDS. And how do you get the kid out of the bed when he gets older? And I knew I was going back to work and needed to get a good night's sleep. Whatever, just not going to do it. Not for us.

Then I had the baby. And the baby would not sleep at first if he wasn't up against me. In the hospital he had to be next to me. At home those first few days, I had to curl around him on the bed to get him to sleep. I didn't get any sleep, but at least my body got a tiny bit of rest.

It was also really interesting... I would try to lay him about a foot away from me in the middle of the bed (DH was in another bed) and jut try to touch my arm against him because I was deathly afraid of rolling over on to him. Michael, all swaddled up, would get on his side and wiggle his way towards me and then latch on to whatever he could. (I tell you, this kid never quit eating.)

It doesn't help that I never really figured out side nursing either. I just don't get it. I can do it, but it isn't comfortable. Not being able to side nurse comfortably just makes me feel defective in a new way.

The co-sleeping only lasted a couple of days. I think I actually got better rest just holding him in the recliner. But every night after (well, every night that I actually got to sleep in a bed), I had a nightmare that the baby was falling off the bed. I totally freaked out every night. I grabbed my husband for dear life thinking he was the baby dozens of times. Eventually, I got so used to the dream I would realize that I was having it and resist grabbing, but I still got woken up by it.

I completely regretted the few nights that we co-slept for the next couple months.

Then a couple of weeks ago, one afternoon on the weekend, me and DH were so tired and Michael was not wanting to nap, so against my better judgement, we all climbed into be together (cats too... not near the baby of course... they were safely cuddling with each other at the end of the bed) and laid down. I side nursed Michael (still uncomfortably). But Michael and my husband (and the cats) had a good nap. I may have nodded off for a couple of seconds.

My nightmares stopped that night. Crazy. It turns out, all I needed was a positive co-sleeping experience to counter the bad.

We are still not co-sleeping. But we did take another nap together last weekend. It is really nice being able to do that and I did enjoy it now that I know it doesn't have to cause more nightmares.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

The banana was a bust

But that's ok!

Michelle sent me some info on Baby Led Weaning/Solids. I'd kinda heard about it before and I took another look at it. There are definitely certain aspects of it that I like, but it's a little scarier than spoon feeding and enough out of the norm that I'm just not sure what I think.

But it made me rethink the first meal a little. I decided to just give him the banana and see what happens. He squished it up some, he never tried to put it in his mouth (which is weird, because he puts everything in his mouth). He just wasn't interested really. He wasn't hungry at the time either, which was on purpose. I just wanted it to be fun.

So we will hold off trying again for a week or two.

And I'm not sure if we want to take a BLW approach or not. My husband is pretty against it (from what I can tell, it seems like all dads are against it). My plan is to take it meal by meal.

So we weren't able to get the first feeding milestone passed Friday night, but we did manage to get another! He rolled back to front, FINALLY! He's been rolling over 97% of the way for more than a month, but wouldn't finish the job. He just wants to be on his side to look around (and tease mommy and daddy). He's like a fish, he would just flip back and forth from one side to another. He would come so close to all the way over so often and DH and me would hold our breath, wondering if he was finally going to do it. But then it happened. Me and DH were both there with him on the floor after giving up on the solids. He's been leaving us hanging for so long, we were so happy to see him do it.

Anyhow, I'm sorry I don't have anything more interesting to post than more gushing about my kid. Oh well. And while I'm at it, here's the cutie pie having some fun.

Why does blogger upload so grainy? Oh well.

Thursday, July 8, 2010


Some days I know I'm not doing good when I am still putting on my shirt as I get into the car to go to work.

Some days I think I'm doing good and discover that I put my underwear on inside out hours later.


If I didn't know better, I'd think I was pregnant. Trust me, absolutely no chance of that, but my sniffer is turned up, I'm a little queasy all the time lately and I'm retaining water. It could be PMS, or it could just be nothing, because my body doesn't need a reason to make me feel crappy.


My friend P (P is my only IRL friend I let read this, everyone wave Hi to P) sent me a funny card that said: Whoever said "there's no use crying over spilled milk" obviously never pumped six ounces, then accidentally dumped it.

Very funny, I can totally relate, but if I spilled 6 ounces, someone would have to talk me off a ledge. Thank you P.



Help out Celia's friend by taking a minute to vote for her charity to raise awareness about Dravet Syndrome.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Watching bananas ripen

I am thinking about starting Michael on solids.

I am not at ease with this. I'm definitely over thinking it.

The recommendation these days is to delay solids until 6 months, but opinions differ. Our pediatrician wanted us to start at 4 months, to which I said, "I don't think he's ready." My ped protested me a little and I just flat out ignored him. I got a tiny thrill out of blatantly ignoring his advice. But truthly, Michael wasn't ready at that time. Among other signs that were missing, he couldn't sit up well enough and I believed that he should be able to sit up pretty well before shoving a spoon in his mouth.

The AAP recommends exclusive breastfeeding for 6 months. I mostly agree with them, but I have also read some of the papers that they base their recommendation on and they are actually less convincing on their own.

But probably the most sensible advice to me on this subject is: Watch your baby, not the calendar.

So I have been watching him, and I think he's ready. Actually, from watching him, I don't know that he's so much ready to "eat" solids as he is ready to familiarize himself with the concept, which I think is usually the goal of the first feedings anyhow. He's intrigued when he watches me stuff my face, I think he wants to know what that is all about.

And I've been reading a lot off of Dr. Greene's website. I can't find the article, but he recommended that for a baby's first feeding that you use a whole food and to eat some of the food in front of the baby. Let the baby feel the food. Mash it up in front of him. Let the baby understand that food is actually something and not just some mysterious mushy stuff. This advice really appealed to me and makes a lot of sense. So for Michael's first feeding I decided it would be best to try a banana.

So there are a couple of bananas ripening on my counter. Theoretically, when they get nice and ripe, Michael will get his first solid feeding. Probably Friday or Saturday from the looks of things.

He's ready, but I'm not. I see this first meal as the beginning of the end. My baby's first step towards becoming a big boy. I don't want him to grow up. I want him to be my precious, little baby forever. I loathe those bananas. I hope they stay green FOREVER, but they are already starting to spot. I do not want to do this... I could put it off. Wait a few more weeks until he is 6 months, but I don't really think that will make me feel better about it.

I love how things are right now. I love that I can feed and nourish my baby with my body. That I can hold him and cuddle him and he can be 100% happy with nothing else other than me. I love the perfect moment of watching his eyes get heavy as he drifts off on my breast and starts to comfort nurse. I wait for him to fall off. Then I hold him awhile just to take in that moment for a little longer before I put him in his crib.

I know starting solids isn't going to be an abrupt and imminent end to breastfeeding... I just don't want my baby to grow up.

ETA - Found that article: Brown vs. White Rice: A fork in the road