Sunday, August 29, 2010

Send in FEMA

This week has been a disaster. I don't even know where to begin. I thought about doing a post mid week saying that if one more thing tries to kill me this week, it just might succeed.

Michael, untop of ear infections and diaper rash, also bought home a cold (or something). I got it first (DH is sick with it now too) and couldn't figure out if it was just allergies or a cold or strep. I never saw my tonsils so I did not pursue the strep diagnosis (since I would have to miss work and pay to do that) but I did pursue it as an allergy attack. And that was somewhat effective.

I finally broke down and took some Claritin (just plan Claritin, no "D"). I researched that it was "ok" to take some and it would not effect my supply and you know what, I feel like I'm not making milk in a way that scares me and sends me into a corner to cry. I totally regret trying to do anything to make myself feel better--which it only half way helped. I still feel like I'm swallowing shards of glass every time I swallow.

I've also been really dehydrated (despite downing massive amounts of water). It was so bad on Thursday I had to leave work and run to the grocery store to get some Gatorade G (I feel stupid calling it "G"... sounds like I'm trying too hard or something). I didn't dock myself the time at work because if I hadn't have gone to get it, they would have had to call me an ambulance (seriously); I had some kind of major electrolyte imbalance going on. And let's not forget that I would have some sick time to take if it weren't for my company's shitty maternity policy (or lack there of).

And that brings me to the other extreme disaster this week: my job. I've been a foul mindset when it comes to work since learning about my shitty maternity leave and then some goals bullshit that I had to do on maternity leave pregnancy induced disability and FMLA. A project that I'm working on is tanking. It's tanking for a number of reasons, some of which are my fault (some of which are NOT). We sat down and had a talk. The word "unacceptable" was used a couple of time. I don't care. (By the way, the probability that someone from my company knows that I have this blog is 99% and it's probably just as likely that they snoop on my by reading it. Not cool... another reason I'm not so hot on work right now... it's invading my life.)

Ok, that's not true, I DO care. I do not want to get fired, but I also do not appreciate a lot of BS going on at work lately. I do not appreciate the way the new management is handling things. I do not appreciate a lot about the current situation. It would be best for our finances to keep me working but me and my husband both agree that there would be a lot of good things about me not working too. So I will work hard to keep the status quo, but I'm fucking sick of killing myself for my fucking job and I'm not going to fucking do it any-fucking-more. My sanity and my child are more important. And if anyone I work with has an opinion contrary to that, I DON'T CARE.

In other news, we went to my brother's house yesterday to have a surprise birthday party for my mom. It went ok, but I forgot to bring something to eat so I went ahead and ate some cheesy potatoes, a cannoli, cake and ice cream (real healthy, I know). After weeks of having a virtually spit-up free baby, today was not so great. But it reminds me that I'm avoiding these allergens for a reason and it's not ok to cheat. I'm thinking the cheesy potatoes were the culprit because my SIL makes them with cream of mushroom soup, which contains Soy Protein Concentrate (which I definitely would have skipped if I would have known that yesterday). I should have just stuck to the desserts.


Kate said...

Sorry for your shitty week. Hop the next one is much better with a healthy you and healthy family.

Michelle said...

I'm sorry you had a bad week. I hate snoopers! I have one on my blog too which is why I've cut back in a lot of what I use to talk about. I hope the work situation improves or works out for whichever way is best.
btw, detergent works awesome. I'm going to post a new update tomorrow or sometime this week, but if you wanted the recipe, email me as a reminder.

Celia said...

That is a lot. Ugh. If my family ever finds out about my blog it is going password protected.

Gina said...

Sorry for the bad week. It always seems to happen all at once.

Chelle said...

man-oh-man, I hope things turn around for you! That is one rough week.

Sorry to hear it.