Saturday, September 24, 2011

Inlaws

We are visiting my inlaws this week. DH always comes home this week because it's the county fair (I know, it's really late here) and the fair is a huge deal around here.

I was looking forward to this week because I need a break from Michael, but I hate to leave him so going somewhere and letting Grandma play with him all day with him on the other side of the room is more appealing to me. Except...

Well, there are a lot of things that are stressful about traveling and visiting family and I don't need to make the laundry list out, but I've been particularly put out by MIL's complete disregard for Michael's schedule. Michael is the least flexible child in the world. Alright, that might be an exaggeration, but it's not far off. If he's always getting his way and having a good time then you can do things whenever you want, but the second you try to make him do something he doesn't want to, all hell breaks loose. And I can't blame him for being cranky when he's tired or hungry, I am too.

I don't know how many times I've told her that Michael naps at noon. And she can't hear so I'm literally yelling it at her which irritates me more. He's rubbing his eyes and is about to fall out of the chair, isn't it obvious, why do I have to say anything at all? I thought she was eating lunch with some fair people at 11:30 the other day but apparently we were suppose to eat lunch with her. So I ordered for Michael as soon as we got there so that he could eat but I had to leave with my food in a doggie bag as soon as it came and didn't get to eat it for another hour because I had to take Michael home by myself (everyone else, DH included stayed and visited and ate). And he missed half of his nap and cried the entire time we were at the fair that night and DH and I had take him home early.


Crying on the train ride.

And MIL keeps saying, "Oh, he's just crying because that other little boy was crying."

NO! He's crying because he missed half his nap and he's tired and cranky.

Then she'll say something like, "Well, I thought he could just sleep in the car."

NO! FUCKING NO! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU HE WON'T SLEEP IN THE CAR? It doesn't matter that every other kid on the planet falls asleep in the car, mine doesn't. Mine falls asleep in my arms. Some people my find that ridiculous, but I think it's kinda sweet (and he does fall asleep in his crib at night, but only after we've nursed and cuddled). I like being a mommy. I don't like people messing with our routine and making me feel like a bad mommy because my kid is crying in the backseat because he's tired and doesn't want to be in the car.

I chewed out my husband quite a bit after that. He's different around his family so I just laid it down that we are following Michael's schedule and doing things on time and other people join us if they like and he'd better be the first one to let everyone know that.

It's not like we don't give any. I'm ok with moving things by a half hour or so. We pack snacks to eat on the go. We make the best of the situation, but he needs some consistency to his days. The kid didn't have a daytime schedule until he was nearly 14 months, trust me, we don't want to go back to that.

And MIL is also watching our nephew for a couple of days. Oh man do I want to tattle on her for completely disregard SIL's schedule (not that I will). They are bigger on the schedule than we are. She had him up past 10:30 last night (we went to bed, so I'm not sure when he did) and he only took an hour nap today. It's 9:30PM now and Michael's been asleep for an hour and they still aren't even home. The difference is that he IS the world's most flexible child and he's a huge Grandma's boy so he tolerates it well (but he'll have a melt down too if it goes on for too long).

But seeing nephew and Michael together is just another reminder to me of how completely different they are. We took the boys for a walk this afternoon. Michael ran ahead the whole way, stopping to play in leaves or pick up an acorn. Nephew insisted that Grandma carry him almost the whole time and is practically afraid of Michael (he's just too energetic for him). Michael wears me out and sometimes I just want him to stop wiggling for awhile but if I had to choose between the two personalities, I take my running, screaming, curious wiggle-worm any day.


C'mon! I'm waiting!


I'm not waiting anymore.


Inspecting some cool tree bark

Maybe I'm just grumpy because they don't have kettle corn down here.

2 comments:

~Jess said...

Sounds like a wonderful time with family! DD is pretty easy to deal with, but MIL disregards her schedule too. Grr!

Looks like a great nature walk.

birdsandsquirrels said...

Why is it so difficult for old people to understand/remember that little kids need naps?! We had the same issue on a trip recently with my in laws. They would take forever getting ready in the morning and want to leave at 11 or 12 to go drive around all afternoon and they wanted us to go with them. "Oh, can't she just sleep in the car?" NO. No she can't. She NEEDS a two hour nap in a crib or pack and play. I mean really, these people had kids at one point, yes thirty something years ago, but some things don't change, like NAPS!

Sorry, I get totally riled up about that too. I really hate it when the schedule gets thrown off and then they are like "wow, she's cranky" and insinuating that she is a bad kid. No, she is just f-ing tired.

And no kettle corn? WTF? That suck. There is not much better than fresh kettle corn, still warm from the kettle. I hope your visit gets better.

Oh, and Michael in the tree bark picture - adorable! He looks so grown up!