Thursday, September 13, 2012

From the mouths of babes

Michael has reached that age where he is interested in babies and would like us to have another one. His little pleas for a baby sister (usually he asks for a sister, probably because most of the characters in his books have little sisters) aren't enough for me to want to have another baby, but they are somewhat adorable.

Last night he asked me to have a baby again and I told him that we weren't ready to have another baby again. Then he said in his sweet little voice, "I will pray to Jesus for a baby."

Ok, (1) adorable, my heart melted right out of my chest with that one and (2) who or where did he get that from or did he actually come up with it himself? I'm strongly suspecting preschool may have had an influence here. I can't help but wonder what that kid says about me when I'm not around.

But in truth, we are gearing up to try to have another baby. We'd like to start TTCing again at the end of the year or beginning of next year. I didn't want to get too far ahead of myself and mention anything before now because I was worried I might need a couple more surgeries for my wrist. (My orthopedist was talking about removing a piece of my bone!) But it seems that the only surgery that I'm facing is getting my plate removed and they won't do that until it's been in for a year. So if I don't take too long to get pregnant, we could do it after having the baby.

I started back on my intensive supplement schedule... 5,000 mcg of folic acid per day (I take six 800mcg pills and round up), baby aspirin, and prenatal in addition to my regular metformin, zoloft and misc. vitamins and supplements. I'm taking nearly 20 pills a day again. wunderbar.

But the good news is that I'm very optimistic that we will conceive without medical assistance this time. My PCOS and MTHFR are under control with the meds. My period appeared* when Michael was a year old. Since then I've had 18 cycles in a row, averaging 31 days. Don't hate me because I'm regular :)

One snag in my plans is that I don't have a OB anymore. The hospital I had Michael in closed down it's maternity ward this year and eliminated McSoothy's position. She hasn't taken another position in the area, to my knowledge and I don't know who to use as my doctor now. Thinking about the OB situation gives me a bit of a headache. It's not really important yet, but if I do get pregnant, I want to have my progesterone levels monitored again and therefore probably need to establish a relationship with someone now. I could get back in contact with my fertility clinic for it, but it would be nice to just have one local dr. for everything this time.

I'm in a really good place right now. My mental health is better than it's ever been. My desire for another child is coming out of love and not jealously/baby envy (a year ago I don't think I could honestly say that). So I'm really looking forward to getting a chance to have another baby. And I get to look forward to TTCing with optimism this time instead of fear and doubt. I hope my experience lives up to my expectation this time.

*I would say my period reappeared, but that implies that I had one before getting pregnant, and I don't feel that's really accurate.


birds and squirrels said...

Aww, Michael's request is so cute!

I am so glad that you are in a good space, and I am excited to hear about your ttc plans! That is amazing that you have had 18 31 day cycles in a row! Talk about kicking PCOS's ass!

Good luck finding a good OB. I know how hard it is to find a good one.

I'm sorry I haven't been a good commenter lately. I have kept a bunch of posts unread, intending to fire up the laptop to comment (because it is darn near impossible to comment from my phone), and I just never have a spare moment. I read blogs all the time still, mostly while nursing baby J, but commenting is difficult. Right now I can hear both Birdie and J on the monitors and crying will begin momentarily, I am sure. Oh the things you have to look forward to with two. It's amazing and so so hard at the same time. Good luck!

Celia said...

Amazing and hard and no spare moments does describe it. You will be in the best position of all of us because Michael will be older. I would try potty training now, because we are training Peter and it is a complete bitch because the baby ALWAYS needs to nurse when Peter needs to pee.

Amanda said...

Michael has been potty trained for months. It's hard work, but it is SO WORTH IT. Keep at it.

Michelle said...

That is so cute!!
And very exciting to be close to trying again. :)
I'm jealous of the regular periods. I know I have a few more random ovulations than I use to, and I think a lot of it for me is that I haven't been thinking much about it. One day I'll have some horrible pains, and the lovely discharge, then panic for 2 weeks wondering if I wasn't careful. Right now I'm still terrified of being pregnant and everything else we have going on. But part of me secretly hopes as I'm waiting....It's crazy.
I hope you have success without medical help when you do start trying again. That would be so awesome to say you've overcome that and know what works for you.

Rachel said...

It's great to hear that things are going so well. Wowie on the cycles. I got one ... and now nada, but I remain ever-hopeful (or delusional). I really hope that this round of TTC goes exactly as you've planned.

Sophie said...

Michael sounds like such a sweetie :).

Congrats on the 18 cycles in a row! That's awesome!